sunflower

it's raining here. a lot. and i didn't do much this weekend, except play with babies and google reader and participate in an epic soccer game in the rain.

AND i'm doing STATA (to analyze data = awesome); i was thrilled to discover this was a command:

welch specifies that the approximate degrees of freedom for the test be obtained from Welch's formula (1947) rather than Satterthwaite's approximation formula (1946), which is the default when unequal is specified. Specifying welch implies unequal.

and, i just like this and watch it on the regular:

Compliment [by rives]

I remember the first time
you named me "Good morning."

And how, the night before,
you considered my ceiling,
where the passing cars outside
the passing cars outside
the passing cars outside
cast their shadows and liquid lights
through the slats of my blinds.

You said: "Hey Romeo--
your CD player is skipping again...
but your ceiling's like fireworks for poor folks!"
And I liked that.

I like the tall pauses you take
when you tell your nephews knock-knock jokes.
And I like your theory
that men and women's shirts button on opposite sides
so that couples can get dressed facing each other
after making love.

You seem to season your seasons,
your days, your time
with rhyme, not reason,
I've seen you. Daily. Nightly.
I've watched you housebreak a puppy
just by asking politely.

And your remedy for insomnia?
Is to pile every pillow and blanket into the tub
and you nap there like you're taking
a patchwork bath,
and I said once: "Oh--I wish I had a PICTURE!"
and you said: "Oh--I wish you and I had HOT SEX,
YOU gave ME a PEDICURE,
and then ELVES showed up at our doorstep,
with a PIZZA, to tell us JESUS just built a TREEHOUSE
in the backyard, and he'd like to meet us both,
so HOP IN HOTSHOT!"

You're weird,
with a capital "WE."
And I'm grateful, I marvel,
you've helped me hammer
some of my worst manners into manhood,
but I still admit--I like the way your shorts fit,
and how, overall, you'd call me "smart,"
even though sometimes
I do really stupid shit.

And I like how you giggle with your lips closed
like you've got a secret little moon in your mouth.

But I'm not insisting you're some kind of goddess,
(I know you're suspicious of unspecific love poems).
You're more like a sunflower,
growing in the courtyard of an old folks home--
you mean things to people on a daily basis,
and this petty poem won't explain
just how "my favorite" your face is,
(but I wish I'd been your bathroom mirror
the day they took off your braces).

You're so pretty.

You're like a vivid video game
and I'm the idiot kid
just trying to get to your next level--
I like your right-shoulder angel,
Hell, I like your left-shoulder devil.
I admire the lively deeds you do.
So if you come through a doorway again,
in a thrift store poncho,
or a drop-dead evening gown,
twirling and asking:
"Well, whaddya think?"
I'm gonna tell you:

"Shit howdy, Sunshine,
sit your fine self down!
If you're looking for a compliment--

I think you've come
to the right place."

this may not be too happy

it rains here right now. for about an hour or so a day. i don't mind it so much, yet.

recently i've been reading a lot about Monsanto. the company literally owns the world, and their patent on GE seeds has driven subsistence farmers in India and beyond to suicide, because the poor men can't afford their never-ending cyclic debt. namely, i'm acquiring knowledge to further damn the man.

on wednesday i went on an OVC (orphans and vulnerable children) visit in the local slum, Lancas. It is a branch of AMPATH here that acknowledges the large number of orphaned children due to HIV and works with their care takers to ensure their well-being and adherence to their ARV treatment (when necessary). I walked around for 4 hours with Izaih, a Luo from Kisumu who has lived in Eldoret for the past two decades. He never attended secondary school, but was working for AMPATH as a community health worker. He talked my ear off about Kenyan politics and the historical implications of it all. Following the 2008 post-election violence he feared for his family and moved his wife and two daughters back to Kisumu, keeping only his 4 year old son with him. We disagreed that "Iraqis are bad," and hopefully he at least thought (if only to humor me) that maybe the extreme terrorists didn't actually represent the entire Iraqi population. He raved about Obama and showed me a small picture of him he carried in his wallet. I realized I carried a picture of Obama too (on the metro card from the Inauguration) and gave it to him--it had 3 dollars left on it, so if he ever makes it to D.C. he can afford a one-way fare. so i figure my job here is done. His dream is to open a laundromat and he already has a washing machine!

we visited a little boy, named Juma, who was living with his aunt in a sheet metal hut. he was horribly stunted and at 5 years old was significantly smaller than his 3 year old, HIV-positive cousin, who was doing well on ARVs. the aunt (not being her biological child) wasn't feeding him appropriately and it was Izaih's role to visit every day and make sure he was getting fed. he was sweet and was wearing a denim jacket that was way too big for him with the sleeves rolled up.

ninafurahia kukutena na wewe. i am happy to meet you.

the CHWs and I

the next day 4 of us went into town with one of the guys that works at the center for street kids here to meet with the street girls. we wanted to make friends and see what issues they faced--in the hopes of setting up a public health curriculum for them, but we shall see. the aid world certainly has its politics and i am in the midst of formulating an opinion about it all. but the girls were lovely. high as hell on glue, but nice and curious. we walked through town holding their hands, and we definitely looked like missionaries. not such a bad thing to the locals here, but stereotypical nonetheless. i talked with a girl for awhile who is 21 and pregnant and rocking a "I heart Guinness" t-shirt from 2006. someone, somewhere has done good work--they all knew where to get tested for HIV and where they could find condoms. yet, many of them often cited being raped by other street boys (some as young as 8) and said that in order to sleep in sheltered, "safe" places they often had to give gifts (or sex) to the guards.

we were walking out (successful? hard to say. what did we hope to accomplish?) through the field by the river on the other side of town--called "base" since many street kids live there and bathe, wash their clothes, etc--when Lanawambui (a giggly 7-year old girl with fuzzy hair and a torn skirt) got thrown to the ground and kicked in the face and stomach by another boy (presumably very high on glue). she started wailing. like, what the shit? i lost it. i walked the 100 yards to her while the other boy got beaten (violence with violence?) by the worker we were with. i got teary eyed for the first time since being here. man, it got to me. seeing this little girl get beaten out of the corner of my eye. poverty is digestable after awhile. you look past the sheet metal huts and old clothing because mostly they have smiles and are welcoming and its possible to recognize the prettier things in life, like their company and learning. but shit, violence. i can't handle it. like it just nails me in the gut. i got so pissed. but i'm just a lil mzungu visiting a world of bare survival among children i know nothing about. and i will never know.

violence.

then today we went back to the nearby slum for our urban-real-life-in-kenya visit. and man oh man did it rain. the day consisted of us walking around in 6" of mud (slash fecal matter?) for about 6 hours. no one fell though. and it's nice to walk that slow once in awhile. we visited a local clinic where they do 28 deliveries a month at a cost of KSh 1500--20 dollars--yet many people can't afford it and chose to deliver at home. a woman was in labor while we were there and as we finished our tour in the maternity ward we heard healthy screams of a newborn. we visited a woman who is a local brewer of changa and watched the 80 proof, illegal brew being made. we also sat in her living room and watched an entire dvd of michael jackson music videos. be jealous. we ate lunch with a few local guys and they spoke to us about the post-election violence. they got teary eyed and it was hard to talk about--it became increasingly clear that some were on the side that did the killing and some were on the side that got attacked. they mentioned the church that was burned to the ground with women and children inside, and mentioned the uncertainty that lay ahead with the 2012 election. ultimately, the half dozen or so predominant tribes in kenya all want a chance to hold political power. historically, the kikuyu's (the majority from the central province) have had the power (first with jomo kenyatta and now with kibaki) and the kalinjin's got a piece (with daniel arap moi) but there are others that feel their leaders should have a piece. including a current member of parliament, william ruto--who is idolized for his political prowess and by the fact he shares a name with a large independence fighter-- of the nandi tribe from eldoret. it's slightly difficult to wrap your head around, but the cultural implications on politics and the vertical display of power is unyielding and (infamously) interesting to me. we then cruised around in a P-I-M-P-ed out matatu with lasers and a big screen tv, we hopped out and talked to local men and children and then made it back to town where we got pointed and laughed at for our muddy shoes. (cultural note: kenyans keep their shoes impeccably clean and every half block there are men and boys just waiting with shoe shine and rags to make 'em look like new)

adorable kids and their toys made from bottles

the ladies in the living room

kayla in the kickin' matatu

the (empty) maternity ward

watoto

mud. matope.

this weekend, i am staying here. the ladies are making their way to nairobi and me and my thinning wallet are sitting around town. i plan on watching movies and attempting to get ahead on homework. we shall see how that goes.

and we'll see how this goes: darfur signed an agreement, but you should probably watch this.

taxi max

so, per request of sarah lawson, i have captured the infamous "Taxi Max" on video. as you will see, as a mzungu, I am not very memorable. but he is! ladies and gentlemen...taxi max.

the internet blackout of 2010

the internet was down here all weekend and yesterday. like, what the crap?! internet goes out in africa? we barely lived to tell (err, blog) about it.

thursday night (after the gym) i stayed up quite late. downloading these guys and watching this video. it was nice to be a night owl.

friday afternoon we jetted for kakamega rainforest. it was awesome 'cause i was there 5 years ago and stayed in the same place. we played the post-it game with some brits (the one where you put a famous person on your forehead and try to guess who they are--i STRUGGLED with amy winehouse). i peed down the dark hole with ants that night until the next morning the british guy apologized for using the women's restroom. there is a women's room?! oh yes, complete with a toilet. silly me for thinking things had to be hard. we then went on a 4 hour walking tour through the forest. so, apparently kakamega has hundreds of bird species and people come from all over the world to bird watch there. this is really great, but i don't think i care much about birds. so, to say i was bored would be an overstatement, but to say i was stimulated would be a big ole lie. i was somewhere in the middle. for 4 hours. in the rainforest.

where we stayed

the group leaving the forest

yay! i'm in a rainforest!

the latest from my (messed up) digital camera.

but then it rained. and i got to nap on a porch and take in the smell and the cool breeze and life was wonderful.

that night we returned back to town without incident and had an epic house party at the farm. it was fun and there was dancing and more beer pong and good company. no (incriminating) pictures were taken, in case i want to run for kenyan political office some day. we passed the time on sunday morning by reading the dictionary and watching olympic highlights. i went on a bike ride and a little boy clapped when i rode with no hands then took a picture of me with his camera phone. later that night i watched two movies and indulged my laziness.

the farm

people with the calves!

in other news, abigail at the sally test center is getting so much healthier and eating loads and curious and talking (?) and then we sat in a classroom for 4 hours which included a meeting on expanding AMPATH's services to include chronic diseases (surprisingly, diabetes is about 4-5% here). i read about kenya's education woes and ARVs in S. Africa and how (thank goodness!) Dick is resting comfortably in our backyard.

and kayla told me that your right ear is better for processing voices, so when you pull out your headphones to answer someone, you should remove the right ear bud. the left one is better for music. so says men's health magazine.

but what i'm sure you all are really wondering is, can lil weezy bring his teeth to prison?

water water everywhere

it's wednesday here, at 1:22pm. blogger needs to get it together.

all is good in the neighborhood here. we (kei, kayla, megan and i) switched houses with the other girls (meghan, wambui, kanjani and rachel) which means 3 things:

1. we have been here for 5.5 weeks

2. i no longer live in a hostel with a balcony

3. i have cold milk, all the juice i could want, a washing machine, hot water and 3 included meals a day.

(i recognize my excitement with western luxuries may be a little out of place, but i'm okay with that for right now)

on monday, as a final-farewell-to-the-first-chapter-of-our-time-here-in-kenya activity we went to umbrella falls just outside of town. we took "taxi max" there, who is quite entertaining and doubles as a tour guide! we drove in his diesel-power 1978? mercedes listening to "the music i know you ladies like," which is typically kenyan dancing jams and old-skool pop music. we "off-roaded" through "california" (a nearby village), past the landfill for eldoret ("it smells lovely, right ladies?"), and dozens of beautiful children in school uniforms. we got to the area where the falls are (it is a local power plant) and began to walk (err, scramble) through the woods. max had us jump over this 6 foot stream of water. i was uncharacteristically (?) nervous about jumping over and whined a bit. then i did it (thinking it was imperative to getting to the waterfall). we jumped. we walked 12 steps. we looked down at the waterfall and max had us jump back over! really? i have never heard a kenyan laugh (at himself) so hard.

bronsen jumping over the stream

the sky is pretty

us ladies with the waterfall

kayla and i

OMG! me in front of a waterfall!

us ladies in the waterfall (max was a phenomenal photographer)

the ride home

the falls were pretty. and we got to swim and hike and frolic. we even saw a hyrax (which was a first for me) apparently, because of their tusks they are related to the elephant. you can be the judge of that. then we rode home in the car and had a delicious dinner ("yes that's right, we will have 4 cheeseburgers, pleaseandthankyou.") at a local restaurant with dubbed spanish soap operas playing in the background.

yesterday i held some babies, got SUPER excited about the sasquatch line-up, went to class, read this about kenyan politics, and enjoyed the downpour that engulfed eldoret for a few hours. oh! and i went to the gym and got my butt kicked by the runner up in the mr. africa heavyweight competition. naturally. today we gave a presentation in class about the socio-cultural determinants of health in sub-saharan africa. i had marriage: the average age for first marriage in kenya is 26.3 for men and 21.6 for women, and the maasai typically have an average of 2.8 wives. just so you know.

the rain after class

valentines

i love with my short life i have met

so many people i deeply care for

i've been jammin' yeasayer these days, i like them.

so, in kenya there a LOT of speed bumps. i suppose this makes sense 'cause there's no guarantee people would drive the speed limit (if there was to be such a thing) but they will slow down for bumps (most of the time, anyway). i know this because we drove out to mt. elgon national park this weekend and went through a handful of towns in the 2.5 hr drive which means we went over a lot of speed bumps = hard to nap.

the park was beautiful. after a (somewhat serious) translation mishap at the entrance gate over camping "fees" ($15 a person? really?) we set up shop with the baboons in a pretty field and went for a hike. there are 300 elephants in the park, but the chances of spotting them are slim. so we checked out a cave with bats and a little waterfall on the outside. it was dark and cool inside and quite awesome. then we piled back in the car (meghan and i comfortably in the trunk, err--i mean, boot) and hiked up to a ridge that had a spectacular view of the peak of mt. elgon and the farmlands below. our guide was very nice and even brought his own warm box of milk (with a straw!) for when we reached the top. the rest of the evening was nearly perfect. we ate delicious pasta, sat by the fire, drank (cheap as dirt) rum, and listened to tunes. it was a few of the girls' first time camping, but we all fit in the tent and everyone slept like logs. this morning, we woke up and....went horseback riding! yee haw! i was in my element. and horseback riding for the tourists in kenya is a bit more extreme than back home. helmet-less. law-less. brake-less. it was a bit of a ride through the forests of mt. elgon. i was happy.

mark, julie and i outside of the banda

meghan and i hiking up to the cave

meghan and i IN the cave

small people in the cave

the view from the top

mark and our guide in the clouds

fireside hang sessions

picture taken from flamingo--my horse for the day

mark and megan with the pony

when we got back to the site we had to wait for the rest of the group, who had done a separate hike. it seemed like a reasonable idea to nap with the banda door open, when low and behold! a sneaky little baboon snuck into our kitchen. i was mildly surprised to wake up to a large, hairy monkey with a bare, pink bum. on the way home we stopped in kitale for a "valentines" lunch. all the ladies got roses and there was a large buffet for $3. my kind of valentine's. the little kenyan girl in an 80s-style-red-puffy-sparkle-dress-with-shoulder-pads really tied the day together.

friday night we also had out first Moi-GW Partnership dinner. We sat around a fire with our Kenyan colleagues and had roasted meat. and there was a swing set at the restaurant. and i met my "namesake," Lauraine, who is a secretary at the School of Public Health.

kayla and i with our classmate, lydia

also! large health insurance companies made record profits last year, increasing by 56%. they did this by dropping 2.7 million customers. how nice. and there's corruption in kenya?! who knew? and apparently you can detect homosexuality in kenya by medical examination.

otherwise, all is well, i'm excited to have some of the russell stovers chocolates mom sent me--that made it all the way to kenya in time. Happy Valentine's Day, ya'll.

missionaries in haiti

it's early here. i'm working on my cup of coffee. we were out late last night. but, i find the comments of this article interesting.

and maybe, this is hopeful.

and this is very sad (and scary):

Army Sergeant Accused of Waterboarding Four-Year-Old Daughter

Here in this country, an Army sergeant who served in Iraq has been accused of waterboarding his four-year-old daughter because she refused to recite her ABCs. Twenty-seven-year-old Joshua Tabor was arrested last week and charged with assaulting a child. Police in Washington state said the Iraq war veteran would sit his daughter on the edge of the bathroom sink and hold her head down until it was nearly submerged in water, dunking her if she refused to recite the alphabet. Police said they began an investigation of Tabor after receiving reports that he was walking around his neighborhood holding a Kevlar helmet and threatening to bust out windows. [democracynow.org]

just another day in the life

thursday night, after the rain, we called a taxi to head to the gym. "Taxi Max" showed up, but in a car that wasn't his:

us: "Max, this isn't your car."

Max: "Haha, oh i know. I traded with my friend."

us: "you just traded cars?"

Max: "well, yes. the traffic in town is horrible, people forget how to drive in the rain, and i knew it would take me an hour to get here. so he was on the side of the road i wanted to be on and i didn't want to wait to turn around, so we just switched cars!"

us: "huh. so where is your car now?"

Max: "my friend has it. in town. i will get it back from him later."

then we talked about how he didn't know if he had enough gas to get us the 5 minutes across town, so we turned off the car and coasted down the hill ("the E, means enough, right?! ha. so i think i have just enough gas"); he told us how he hit a zebra ("in america you hit deer, ya? in kenya we hit zebra"); and we got rear ended in traffic (in his friend's car) but no big deal, no one was hurt and he wasn't concerned with the fender bender. just another day in the life.

friday we got up early and went to "international cultural day" at Moi University. It was a long day. We were told to be there by 7am (nothing started until 10am); we had to display our culture (we wore jeans and sang 'Take Me Out to the Ballgame'); we came back to town for class (the professor didn't show up). just another day in the life. There WAS beautiful singing and lots of African dancing and Dinka men (from S. Sudan) that were very energetic and proud and entertaining. It was nice to be able to go to the main campus and be a part of the student body for a day.

the dancing dinka

Moi University student choir (video!)

kayla, meghan, megan and i before we "displayed our culture"

friday night we went out dancing (again?! yes. again) it's too much fun dancing and sipping big beers here.

saturday i sat around and studied and went to play with babies. saturday night more sitting around and a horrible movie with katherine heigel that i regret watching the first twenty minutes of.

sunday morning, meghan and i got up and went to a car rally (?!) it was pretty cool and fun and would potentially qualify as 'white trash' back home. my nose (not my neck) got sunburned. but it's an actual sport that people do here. you get a fancy car, put in a roll cage, find a navigator and go drive really fast through local dirt roads and get timed. best time wins a gold (plastic?) trophy. but it was fun to sit around and drink some beers and (dance with the "clowns" that come in for entertainment in front of thousands of spectators and) watch cars go by. then we went back to the farm and sat with andrew and his family for tea. we filled a cooler with wine and beer and drove out to a little picture-perfect pond and had "sundowners" and took in the big, dark clouds until it started to rain. just another day in the life.

the rally cars

little clementine surrounded by curious kenyan children

photo op with the dancing clown

andrew's uncle came in 2nd place, and this is the ceremony to receive your trophy

andrew and i during the festivities

this is what a rally car race looks like (another video!?)

then we went out dancing until 2:30am and went to a hotel with a projector screen for the Super Bowl which lasted until 6am. I found a big ole comfy chair and slept through, more or less, the whole game. But Go, Saints! and it was nice to be doing something at the exact time ya'll were doing it, just on the other side of the world. And i missed the snacks. In particular, the buffalo chicken dip.

this kristof piece is sad, but you should read it.

word.

i am envious of the epic snowstorm in the mid-atlantic states and hope everyone is warm and happy and sledding.

i WOULD bless the rains down in africa

today it rained. hard, africa rain and our taxi driver said "this means God is good! he has not forgotten us!" life stops in town when it rains this hard. people stand under the edges of buildings and in the outdoor hallways at the hospital. the roads flood with brown water and the sound of the rain on the cement and tin roof is loud and rhythmic. i really do love it.

kenyan rain out the window of Sally Test

if at any time you can't find me, i'm probably at the Sally Test Center. i have come to find real happiness sitting on the mat with 4 little babies around me. they are just so beautiful and curious and kind. the one girl, abigail, who is stunted and 11 months old just calmly stares at you. she shares her toys and smiles all the time. and every time i sit with her i feel better. crazy that it takes helpless little children to put everything in perspective.

abigail

and so many of ya'll have said "bring home that little baby jolene" but the catch is the little baby does not have HIV, she is less than a month old, and is already moving to the orphanage tomorrow to begin the adoption process. she will be okay and have no memory of the two weeks she spent in the hospital. but it's the older babies and the ones with HIV that will be left behind.

as an American, adoption in Kenya is extremely difficult. I looked into it. (more so out of curiosity and future plans, i have no real plans to bring home a mini-human in my suitcase. this time, at least.) Kenyan courts are "not institutionally biased" against foreigners seeking adoption, but Kenyan law specifically states that an adoption order shouldn't be made for a sole male applicant or an applicant of a different race (!) because they view the welfare of the child as paramount. in addition, only residents of Kenya can place an adoption order and one must live in country for a minimum of six months to be considered a resident. then assuming the adoption order clears with the courts (which could take a long while) the adoptive parents must live with the child in Kenya for a minimum of three months so a representative from the adoption agency can visit and check-in about the well-being of the child. Assuming the adoptive parents are suitable, a U.S. visa can then be issued.

also, it is illegal to publish or advertise that a parent wants to give a child up for adoption, that a person wants to adopt a child or that a person (that is not an adoption society) is willing to make arrangements for the adoption of a child.

it is so difficult here because Kenya is one of 75 countries signed on to the Hague Adoption Convention of 2008. The convention ultimately aims to "provide a framework for member countries to work together to ensure that children are provided with permanent, loving homes, that take place in the best interests of a child, and that the abduction, sale or traffic of children is prevented." in theory, that sounds good.

i don't have a witty title for this post

it's wednesday. blah. the middle of the week. tonight though is "ladies night" at our little new neighborhood lounge for "decent" people. they have zebra printed seats. we're going to check it out. and in other academic news, i also have to interview a man from heifer international for our qualitative data collection class and we are playing phone tag. yesterday kayla and i wandered the streets aimlessly, looking for it in a nearby neighborhood. the big, wooden, painted signs that said "heifer international" were beautifully stacked inside the gate, which we saw once we had gotten inside. helpful.

but we did get to practice our swahili.

i learned some things so far today:

1. about muslim veils

2. that south sudan is very hungry

3. a "yori yori" is a casual lover. a "friendly match" also means the same thing, according to our kenyan friend anyhow

4. i updated my ipod weather thingy and it's 79 degrees in eldoret right now. and 27 degrees in boston. sorry.

5. botswana has one of the fastest growing economies in the world, with an average growth rate of 7.7%

6. the inga dam in congo will be the largest in the world. good for africa? or its white elephant?

MORE blahgs

(procrastinating in class)

i'm confident enough to promote other blogs, and this one is quite good: iconic photos (<-- dad, i think you would like this)

AND how did i not see Mr. Liss' photographic journey of the best summer in the world?! alaska 2k9

i'm working out!!

tonight i went to the gym. it's called Billy's here in town, and oddly enough, a friendly guy named (wait for it...) Billy, owns it! We went to the aerobics class. It's a small room with HUGE posters of this guy on the walls. The (very) fit, bald kenyan guy leads it, yelling out commands i couldn't understand, and ultimately i learned i have the coordination of an 88-year old woman with a peg leg. the music was a techno-remix-of-jesus-related-songs.

this video about sums it up.

i bought a month-long membership after Billy himself stretches you following your workout. the awkward single white guy with a bowl cut "teaching" pilates from a dvd also sealed the deal.

in other news, i've gotten in the habit of putting my juice boxes in the freezer, so it's just like a smoothie!

and i like this guy's ideas for haiti. i really do hope obama keeps this promise.

and it's okay if you're jealous that this song plays ALL THE TIME HERE.